♪♫ Wonderful Future - Willie Nelson
I have a lot of stuff on my mind, and I haven't been able to talk about it a whole lot. So I'm gonna discuss a little bit of it before I write this blog. To begin; I'm still feeling depressed. I hate that one stupid message is making me feel like shit. I wish I could control my mental disorders and not become upset so easily. I experience emotions five times more intense than the average person. Sure, I'm on medication...but I feel like its not working as well as it used to. Maybe I should talk to my doctor when I see him next month and figure out a solution. I don't wanna give up on my writing over a stupid insult by some anonymous coward. But I was really hurt by that message. And I'll only admit that on here...
I spent most of Monday working on my budget for the next three months. I have a lot of stuff to buy and not a lot of money, but I managed to perfectly budget everything out! And since my mom and step dad don't celebrate holidays, and the rest of my family lives in a different province; its up to me to buy my own birthday and Christmas presents (my birthday is eight days before Christmas). I'll have $200 to buy my cake, tickets for The Hobbit and the rest will be going into my PayPal account so that I can order all of David Lynch's movies on DVD, which will include the complete series of Twin Peaks on DVD as well. I usually just download movies (because I'm poor), but I'm such a huge David Lynch fan and I want to show my love and dedication for him. I already own a ton of merchandise from everything else I love, but I only own two David Lynch items...and they are both shirts. Plus there isn't really much else that I want...except for the eighth season of Supernatural on DVD and a box of Turtles chocolates, but my boyfriend has that covered (I'm pretty sure). :P
After perfecting my budget, my mom gave me some money for Subway (since I don't have many groceries left). When I got there, the guy convinced me to buy a footlong, then he gave me an extra cookie for free and took a dollar off the total cost. I think its because of my blue hair. I totally have magical powers now. ^_^
When I got home, I ended up watching Forrest Gump on the movie channel. That movie makes me cry every damn time. I was crying fifteen minutes into the movie. What is wrong with me!? Afterwards, I downloaded some of David Lynch's short films, mini series and short lived TV series (the ones that are unavailable on DVD). DumbLand made me laugh so hard and I don't know why. Its not supposed to be funny. xD
I did have plans to write...but like I said earlier; too depressed right now. But I did get to work more on my blog labels/tags. I also thought about a fresh start. An entirely new blog, new name, new theme, etc. I would download all the blogs from here and upload them onto my archive blog (which dates back to 2007!), because I never delete blogs. I may have sounded stupid and immature in older blogs, but its a part of who I am and I like to look back and remember. But I'm still unsure about doing it...
Yesterday was pretty great. My lovely boyfriend BJ came to see me, but he was sick and I didn't want him to spread germs in my house, so we decided to go to Rocky's for dinner. During that time, he cheered me up and assured me that I'm really good at writing (he is so wonderful ^_^). I still have that little bit of doubt, but it'll go away in a month or so (at least I hope so...). Anyways, we walked around in the rain for a little bit after our dinner. It wasn't raining too badly, so I didn't mind at all. We also went to Tim Horton's, and guess what!? The smile cookies are back! I look forward to them every year! And my boyfriend was nice enough to buy me one. :3
Since he was sick, he decided to go home early. So he walked me home and we talked about psychology while we waited for his mom to pick him up. It was a really mind-fucking conversation. He really dug deep into my head and uncovered something I didn't even know was there. His university psychology class is really paying off. And I'm pretty sure he is thinking about being a psychologist for a career. I think its the perfect option for him. :P
After he left, I went inside and rummaged through my purse for my keys, then my mom walked in less than a minute later. Perfect timing. She checked the mail before we went inside and I got another package! Its the Psycho shirt that I ordered! It fits me perfectly, and its better quality than I thought it would be too! I love it! But I'm still pissed that the white suspenders I ordered haven't arrived yet. Its been a month! But I contacted the person on Ebay and they said that they are sending me another pair (its only $2 with free shipping - not a big loss for them). I just hope it arrives in time for Halloween (since its gonna be a part of my costume). I'm quite nervous. Oh and my blue hair faded a bit. Its making me sad. I knew the color wasn't gonna stay vibrant forever, but its fading so quickly. Ahhh. D:
After that, I quickly cleaned my room while watching Friends (well...more like listening - I was too distracted by cleaning to pay much attention). I'm trying to keep my room as clean as possible (so that I don't have to spend over five hours cleaning it again). Then I spent my night chatting on Facebook, playing Grand Theft Auto IV and watching Wayne's World. Wooo! My life is so exciting. ;D
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I still haven't gone to bed yet. Clearly my insomnia is to blame. But I have been going to bed a little earlier. Only by an hour or two...but still...that's an improvement! I'm hoping to have an normal sleeping schedule before my next visit with my psychiatrist. I don't want more medication. Five pills a day is already too much. -_-
I have a lot of stuff on my mind, and I haven't been able to talk about it a whole lot. So I'm gonna discuss a little bit of it before I write this blog. To begin; I'm still feeling depressed. I hate that one stupid message is making me feel like shit. I wish I could control my mental disorders and not become upset so easily. I experience emotions five times more intense than the average person. Sure, I'm on medication...but I feel like its not working as well as it used to. Maybe I should talk to my doctor when I see him next month and figure out a solution. I don't wanna give up on my writing over a stupid insult by some anonymous coward. But I was really hurt by that message. And I'll only admit that on here...
I spent most of Monday working on my budget for the next three months. I have a lot of stuff to buy and not a lot of money, but I managed to perfectly budget everything out! And since my mom and step dad don't celebrate holidays, and the rest of my family lives in a different province; its up to me to buy my own birthday and Christmas presents (my birthday is eight days before Christmas). I'll have $200 to buy my cake, tickets for The Hobbit and the rest will be going into my PayPal account so that I can order all of David Lynch's movies on DVD, which will include the complete series of Twin Peaks on DVD as well. I usually just download movies (because I'm poor), but I'm such a huge David Lynch fan and I want to show my love and dedication for him. I already own a ton of merchandise from everything else I love, but I only own two David Lynch items...and they are both shirts. Plus there isn't really much else that I want...except for the eighth season of Supernatural on DVD and a box of Turtles chocolates, but my boyfriend has that covered (I'm pretty sure). :P
After perfecting my budget, my mom gave me some money for Subway (since I don't have many groceries left). When I got there, the guy convinced me to buy a footlong, then he gave me an extra cookie for free and took a dollar off the total cost. I think its because of my blue hair. I totally have magical powers now. ^_^
When I got home, I ended up watching Forrest Gump on the movie channel. That movie makes me cry every damn time. I was crying fifteen minutes into the movie. What is wrong with me!? Afterwards, I downloaded some of David Lynch's short films, mini series and short lived TV series (the ones that are unavailable on DVD). DumbLand made me laugh so hard and I don't know why. Its not supposed to be funny. xD
I did have plans to write...but like I said earlier; too depressed right now. But I did get to work more on my blog labels/tags. I also thought about a fresh start. An entirely new blog, new name, new theme, etc. I would download all the blogs from here and upload them onto my archive blog (which dates back to 2007!), because I never delete blogs. I may have sounded stupid and immature in older blogs, but its a part of who I am and I like to look back and remember. But I'm still unsure about doing it...
Yesterday was pretty great. My lovely boyfriend BJ came to see me, but he was sick and I didn't want him to spread germs in my house, so we decided to go to Rocky's for dinner. During that time, he cheered me up and assured me that I'm really good at writing (he is so wonderful ^_^). I still have that little bit of doubt, but it'll go away in a month or so (at least I hope so...). Anyways, we walked around in the rain for a little bit after our dinner. It wasn't raining too badly, so I didn't mind at all. We also went to Tim Horton's, and guess what!? The smile cookies are back! I look forward to them every year! And my boyfriend was nice enough to buy me one. :3
Since he was sick, he decided to go home early. So he walked me home and we talked about psychology while we waited for his mom to pick him up. It was a really mind-fucking conversation. He really dug deep into my head and uncovered something I didn't even know was there. His university psychology class is really paying off. And I'm pretty sure he is thinking about being a psychologist for a career. I think its the perfect option for him. :P
After he left, I went inside and rummaged through my purse for my keys, then my mom walked in less than a minute later. Perfect timing. She checked the mail before we went inside and I got another package! Its the Psycho shirt that I ordered! It fits me perfectly, and its better quality than I thought it would be too! I love it! But I'm still pissed that the white suspenders I ordered haven't arrived yet. Its been a month! But I contacted the person on Ebay and they said that they are sending me another pair (its only $2 with free shipping - not a big loss for them). I just hope it arrives in time for Halloween (since its gonna be a part of my costume). I'm quite nervous. Oh and my blue hair faded a bit. Its making me sad. I knew the color wasn't gonna stay vibrant forever, but its fading so quickly. Ahhh. D:
After that, I quickly cleaned my room while watching Friends (well...more like listening - I was too distracted by cleaning to pay much attention). I'm trying to keep my room as clean as possible (so that I don't have to spend over five hours cleaning it again). Then I spent my night chatting on Facebook, playing Grand Theft Auto IV and watching Wayne's World. Wooo! My life is so exciting. ;D
.jpg)
I still haven't gone to bed yet. Clearly my insomnia is to blame. But I have been going to bed a little earlier. Only by an hour or two...but still...that's an improvement! I'm hoping to have an normal sleeping schedule before my next visit with my psychiatrist. I don't want more medication. Five pills a day is already too much. -_-
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